Back when my wife and I first started dating, I called her and asked her out for a date on a Friday night. To my surprise, she turned me down and told me that she had other plans. “Other plans? What kind of other plans?” (My ego couldn’t stand being turned down, so I was assuming – no hoping – that she had a good explanation.)”I have a volunteer event to attend and I’m certain that you wouldn’t want to go.” She tried to explain.
“What do you mean I wouldn’t want to go? What kind of event is it? Are you going alone? Why didn’t you tell me about this?” I responded desperately.

“Ok, it’s a formal fundraiser for the AIDS foundation and you have to wear a suit. If you want to go, just meet me there at 7.”

Obviously the newness of the relationship took control of my brain as I responded, “Of course I want to go, sweetheart. I would enjoy spending time with you at any event.”

No big deal right? I would put on my suit (I only had one), go support the AIDS foundation and maybe make some new friends, impress my girlfriend, after it’s over we go out for a drink, etc. Sounds like the perfect plan, right? What could possibly go wrong?

To completely understand what could go wrong, you must first understand what kind of person I was at that time. My political views in those days were somewhere to the right of Rush Limbaugh and the AIDS Foundation was not known for its conservative political stances. Nevertheless, I really liked Tiffany, and I thought I could fake anything for a few hours, so I put on my suit, chose a nice pastel pattern tie, and drove down to meet Tiffany at the fundraiser.

I was figuring on maybe 50 people, mostly college-age activists like Tiffany, but when I pulled in the parking lot, it looked more like the million man march. I had to park about six blocks away, then made my way to the entrance. I had to walk slowly and a little gimpy because the suit pants I owned were about three sizes too small. This unsteady walk made me a little bit nervous in this crowd, but I knew that Tiffany was in there somewhere so I pressed on.

I managed to get inside, find my seat (without recognizing anybody) and a few minutes later Tiffany joined me, and I made it through the program with faked sincerity and applause. Just when I thought it was over, she told me that the candle-lighting ceremony was about to start outside and we should get going so we can stand up front. The thought of being in the front of this crowd gave me a brief panic attack, so I told her I needed to use the restroom. My restroom trip took just long enough for us to find a nice place to stand in the very back of the crowd as the candle-lighting ceremony began.

My life almost changed forever because of what happened next. Truly, history was almost altered forever based on one split second decision that I was about to make. So there we are, arm in arm at the back of the crowd when all of a sudden a local TV news crew turns on their camera and it is pointed directly at me! I took a brief glance at Tiffany who was smiling for the camera, and then I thought about what would happen if my friends and family back in my small town saw me on TV at this progressive event. I did the only thing I could do; I ducked my head under my suit jacket and turned away from the camera.

A few weeks ago when I was talking to one of my customers, he told me about a book he was reading called Be Exactly Where You Are. This book basically tells you to forget about the things that might have happened in the past and focus on where you are today and make no excuses. In other words, don’t blame your current situation on events of your past and rather look forward and take responsibility for your situation. In simpler terms, don’t make excuses for your own shortcomings because your stepmom shot your dad and is on death row.

We all find ourselves in uncomfortable situations with the economy the way it is. We can’t blame our attitude or our work ethic or even our current financial situation on things that happened beyond our control. One thing I’m certain of is that the American economy will come back just like Tiffany did after a couple of weeks – too bad we can’t just apologize and buy roses.